Helene Feuillat, President, Kolkata International Women’s Club Managing Partner, Samskara TransMission Owner, Back 2 Business Coaching

PWI – How long have you lived in India now? What are the lessons you have learned so far?  What is the biggest difference you and your family have found between living in Belgium and living in India?

Expats definitely live a different life, but it is one of the many realities of India. India is a country of contrasts where you face the poorest and the wealthiest at the same time. In Kolkata, there are no condominiums with only foreigners, so that facilitates the contact with the local population. At the KIWC, we also have a great mix of foreigners and local women. Bengalis are very open and I encountered no problem with meeting Indians. Many of my friends are from Kolkata. This is important to get a real feel of the city. They have so many stories to tell, it is absolutely fascinating. As everyone speaks English, there is no language barrier. Bengalis are also known to be fond of culture; the famous writer Tagore is from Kolkata, and there are plenty of cultural and social events in town.
Although there are exceptions (the previous Indian President was a women, as well as the President of the Congress, and some business women as well), there is a huge gender gap. First regarding education, mainly in the rural areas. Poor girls often do not get access to education. They either have to work or take care of their home and smaller children while the parents go to work. There are so many people in this country that everyone has to fight for a seat at university, competition is just so tough and it is starting from the first year of school (5 years). Once graduated, getting a job is also very hard. Gender discrimination is a reality and with equal competences, girls will not get the same positions that are offered to boys . The lack of childcare also means that it is very difficult for mothers to continue to work, unless they can count on their family. Shared family homes are still the way most people live, but it is not always accepted that a woman continues to work after marriage. Many of my friends had arranged marriages and live with their in-laws (arranged marriage does not mean “forced” though! ). Most of them work and have children, but they are all highly educated and have been travelling abroad, so they tend to be more open. Personally, I haven’t felt a difference of treatment here because I was a woman, but an Irish friend of mine told me the other day that at the hospital (where she had to stay a couple of days), the doctors would refuse to speak to her and would only address her husband! You mention religion; Kolkata is quite tolerant compared to other regions in India, but I do think that there is religious discrimination as well. Furthermore, although the cast system has been abolished many years ago, it is still present and segregation is a reality.
Kolkata is not a very trendy expat location so the foreign community is definitely smaller than Delhi, Mumbai, Chennai or Bangalore. But the advantage of this is that everyone knows each other, there is a lot of solidarity. I met the most wonderful people here, and in such a short time, I can say I made true friends from many different countries. Moving abroad is a fantastic experience that I would strongly recommend to anyone! From a professional perspective, I am lucky to have a job that I can do anywhere. Besides, I kept my business in Belgium and I commute every 3 months. In this respect, I feel privileged. I did meet women who had to put their career on hold and that can lead to frustrations. I also met women who found a job here quite easily…Everything is possible, it really depends on what you want!
Coaching in India is actually mainly coaching students to get into universities. Life coaching would more be considered as counseling. Life coaching is not so much present here in Kolkata but it is developing in cities like Chennai, Mumbai and Bangalore. I have a few coaching clients, mainly expats, a few locals. I give training sessions to expats and also to teachers and students. I love giving training here, people are very eager to learn and very open to personal development. This might be a cultural difference: yoga, meditation, questioning yourself etc. is something that is starting early. My children have yoga classes included in their school curriculum and they had an introduction to meditation. Having a spiritual master is also something very common here, that makes personal development fascinating. And no one is shy to admit it!